Don’t Just Take The Band-Aid Off
Are you in pain right now? Not physical pain. Do you have emotional wounds that you’re working through? Or have you worked through your emotional wounds in the past?
I want to talk to you today about why it’s important to stop just taking the Band-Aid off your wounds and letting them heal. Let’s be honest – no one is perfect. We all have skeletons in our closets. Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and all those other social media sites are really just the highlight reel of people’s lives. Some of us, in reality, have major wounds and trauma to get over.
By no means am I belittling any of that though. Today I just want to get the point across that when we don’t let our wounds heal, we stay stuck in life.
Don’t Stay Stuck
Some people who have traumas can be stuck for a while, but they finally understand that they must seek help. They must heal. They seek professional help from coaches, or from counselors. They do the work and they begin the healing process.
I’ve done that myself. I’ve had wounds that I needed to heal, and I went through the process and healed myself. But some people stay stuck. They let their wounds fester. They continue to pick at their wounds. They complain. They place blame. They cry foul and stay trapped. They wear their trauma like a crown or a medal of honor.
There’s a book called Why People Don’t Heal And How They Can, by Caroline Myss. She talks about wounds and refers to people who don’t let their wounds heal as people suffering from “woundology.” Those people are opening their wounds of the past and sharing them with everyone they come in contact with.
Remember, part of what they do is to pass the blame on. They don’t try to take control of that wound; they just blame everyone else for it instead.
It’s normal to want to express yourself to others, but there is a point when you have to take personal responsibility and take charge of your life. Don’t you agree?
When we let anything outside of ourselves or our relationships control us, we’re giving them the power. If you have woundology, you’re giving them the power. You’re picking and picking and re-exposing yourself to the situation. You’re staying the victim.
We Cannot Fix Others
People with woundology also tend to gravitate to people who have the same story as them, or similar. Misery loves company! They let someone else come in and rescue them and fix them. Let’s face it though: fixing anybody is not our job, and we can’t do it for them. The person has to want to be fixed and want to be healed.
People stuck in woundology won’t address their wounds head on. They will allow their past to direct how they have relationships, how they communicate with people, how they raise their family. They let their past control their present. You are not meant to stay broken or wounded. This is why…
You must believe this with all your heart. You are not meant to stay wounded. You can move past your past. You are meant for greatness. You are not meant for mediocrity or for settling. You are not meant to stay in your wound and suffer. You are meant to thrive. You are meant to love yourself and turn around and love others. You are meant to forgive yourself and forgive your past. You are meant to shine.
I like to write posts about things I personally went through. I did have wounds and I suffered from them greatly, but I don’t anymore. I want to leave you with a quote that I love, and it’s so true.
“The truth is unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize the situation is over. You cannot move forward.”
I’ve watched people get stuck in their businesses because they cannot get past their wounds. I’ve watched people get stuck in their marriages because they cannot work past their wounds. I’ve watched people parent their kids out of their wounds because they can’t let their wounds heal.
As your friend, I want to say that you are worth a billion times more than staying stuck in your wounds.
If you got value out of this, or if you’re grieving for someone who is currently suffering from their own emotional wounds, please share this with them. I love to pay it forward and help others, the same way others have helped me. I don’t like hearing that anyone I care about is suffering. I’m always here for you!