Do You Fear Speaking Up?
I want to talk to you today about speaking up and finding your voice. I’m going to start it off with a quote. “Speak up. Be heard. If you don’t say a word, then everything will stay the same way.”Tweet This!Click To Tweet
Isn’t that powerful? Think about it for a second. Are you someone that wants to speak up, but you feel that you don’t have a voice? Do you have a fear inside of you about speaking your mind? Did something or someone in your past convince you that you should remain quiet?
So often in life, we don’t speak up the way we should. I say “we” because for years, I, too, struggled with this. It just became habitual for me. It didn’t amount to great things. It really stunted my growth, so believe me when I say that I speak from experience in this topic.
Why Do We Stay Silent?
So, why do we stay silent? Why are we afraid to share our opinions and our ideas? Maybe it’s the fear of humiliation. Maybe you have felt foolish in the past. Maybe when you’ve spoken up, you’ve felt ostracized. Maybe you have a fear of hurting someone’s feelings. Maybe you have a relationship with someone who, when you speak your mind, it doesn’t amount to good things. Maybe you have a fear of making a scene.
Maybe it’s something in your past. Maybe when you were younger, you had the impression that it was better to be seen than to be heard. Maybe you grew up as a child in a family of more than 1 and you were the “good kid” or the “quiet kid,” and it just perpetuated into you not saying anything.
Maybe, similarly, you’ve been labeled the shy one. Maybe you’ve been in a relationship where you’ve been shot down so many times that at this point you’re gun shy. You don’t speak up because you don’t feel safe. Maybe you’ve been made to feel stupid or unworthy or unintelligent when you share your ideas.
Again: I get it. You’d rather be safe than sorry. So let me tell you 4 reasons why it’s important to speak your mind.
1. Speaking up will make you feel confident. It will take time and practice, but speaking your mind will give you a newfound sense of confidence. Confidence will look so good on you! It will help you believe in yourself. It will help you realize that your voice has merit. You will begin to respect yourself.
Remember this: no one can invalidate you. No one can! Only YOU can allow that to happen. Speaking up says you will not allow that anymore. Your beliefs, your thoughts, your emotions, your ideas, etc. all belong to you. No one can get inside your head!
Take ownership and tell yourself that you are exceptional and bound for greatness. When those negative thoughts take up residence and begin to sabotage your voice, you need to take them back and say no. I’m going to speak out because I am worthy. Because I was made for greatness. Because I am exceptional.
Set An Example
2. Speaking up sets an example to others, especially the little ones in your house. When you speak up, it shows other people that they should not allow anybody to treat them as a doormat. Everyone deserves respect. So speak your mind, even if your voice shakes. Because you know you’re setting an example.
3. Regretting speaking your mind is better than regretting not speaking your mind. Have you ever been in a situation where you have a dialog going inside your head, after the event took place, of everything you could have or should have done? And you regret it? Speak your mind now! It’s better to regret what you spoke than regret what you didn’t speak.
Silence Equals Approval
4. When you don’t speak up, your silence equals approval. You’re giving people permission to just walk all over you. You shouldn’t be willing to compromise your self-worth. Don’t give people that ability. Silence equals approval.
Summing It Up
I have two more quotes to sum this all up.
“It’s better to speak your mind than to silently resent.”
“If you avoid conflict to keep the peace, you start a war within yourself.”
In essence, when you don’t speak your mind, you begin harboring all this resentment and unworthiness that affects your health, relationships, job, family, everything. Do not harbor this resentment because you didn’t speak up. It will amount to nothing good.
Don’t Squash Others’ Joy
On the flip side, here’s something else to keep in mind. If you’re the opposite type of personality, and you’re the dominant one and don’t allow your partner or your friend to speak up, just remember this. They don’t have confidence. You’re treating them poorly and squashing their joy.
It’s important for you, also, to do some introspection on what you may be doing to that other person. Everyone deserves a voice, an opinion. Everyone deserves to share their thoughts without being ridiculed. Don’t be that person any longer. Be a supporter!
I hope you got some value out of this. I just want you to know, that if you need me to be your cheerleader, please reach out. I’ve lived these thoughts and emotions and I’ve dealt with feeling ostracized and timid and unintelligent. Always remember…your voice matters!